My Why

A few months ago, my bright, sassy then-15-year old daughter (who has the makings of a brilliant litigator) and I were arguing about her grades.  She thought they were great, and I didn’t think they were good enough to get her into one of the top tier schools she dreams about attending.  In a flash of brilliance, she turned to me with a knowing smile and said, well, if grades are so important and yours were so high, how come YOU didn’t go to an Ivy League, hmm?!?  Game. Set. Match.  She had me and she knew it. It’s a fair question. Why didn’t I go to an ivy league or top 20 school?  I could blame the system, my parents, my hugely competitive high school or our over-burdened guidance counselors, but the truth is, I was ignorant, unprepared, and late to the game by the time I figured things out.  I have no one to blame but myself for not taking the initiative, educating myself and taking the necessary steps to achieve a spot in a top 20 school.  

Back in the dark ages of the 1980’s, before there were iPhones, laptops, the Internet and cartoons airing on days other than Saturday, unless you had your own personal “education Sherpa” to help guide you through your college preparatory years, your knowledge about how to get into a top school (or any school for that matter) required you to spend hours at the local or school library, leafing through the card catalogue, microfiche and outdated admissions brochures for relevant information. While tough schools were still tough to get into even back then, the competition to be one of the chosen ones was nothing compared to what it is today. Today’s applicant pool is global, diverse and multi-talented.  Great grades and high standardized test scores are just table stakes now. Having an idea of the ideal applicant, a strategy to present yourself as one and knowing how to game the system to your advantage are almost a necessity. As a result, parents and kids begin prepping earlier,  often starting with selection of the “appropriate” pre-school.  The pressure on these young children to excel is enormous, often leading to issues with stress and depression. 

Many teens and young adults are eschewing the entire system altogether, choosing to adopt a trade and/or become an entrepreneur instead of incurring the inevitable debt caused by an exorbitantly-priced education.  Even this route requires advanced thought and planning, though.  

I thought about my daughter’s challenge for several weeks.   It made me question the process (then and now), contemplate the alternatives and assess the damage this rush to grow up and achieve inflicts upon children and young adults.  The outcome was a driving need to help my daughter and others navigate the process to the best of my ability.  But what did I have to offer?

Actually, I have a lot to offer.  Over the years, I have launched or overseen summer internship programs at all of my jobs.  At one point, I launched an award-winning mentoring program that is still going strong almost 15 years later.  I currently mentor young adults in both formal and informal programs, and I have been a featured speaker at conferences aimed at helping young adults find jobs in the media and entertainment industry.  The point is, I love speaking and interacting with teens and young adults, and I want to help them via this blog by sharing experiences and offering advice. This is why this blog exists. This is My Why.